Friday, November 30, 2012

Written with an empty mind

Suicide. A common word to people who are stress right? I mean if you want to kill yourself when you're happy than you're CRAZY. Now, what I know about suicides that they are one kind of human being that does not appreciate their life. I mean do you know that while you wake up today, someone is breathing their last breath or even when you are smiling, talking or doing any activity, someone is having their last.

I know that there are times where...

We've lived,
We've loved,
We've lost,
We've missed,
We've hurt,
We've trusted,
We've made mistakes,

 But most of all We have to LEARNED 

So why waste it when there is a lot of things we can do to endure it... It may be hard but THINK
first. Will it make your family happy? will there be any benefit? will it make you feel HAPPY


Love your life...



Monday, November 12, 2012

Ending something doesn't mean its GOODBYE....

Hey there  Sweeties,


School FINALLY ends... Yay? Neh I miss my friends... Even though I really wanted to ignore those retarded PBS... :'(

You see here I wanted to say something to my dear beloved friends...

First thing I wanted to say Thank you for being with me in this whole year. Truthfully I used to be forget, hurt and left and I'm also never the smartest too. But now I actually enjoy this friendship and life. Since I was little no friends are there to play, talk or listen :'( I'm very sad. But as I stepped into SA everything turn out surprisingly to me. People want to be friends with me, I scored a lot too.

so thank you

Aisyah, Jan Er, Asyiqin, Afiqah and Mei Cheng....

 I will forever remember the time we spent together..... I love you guys so MUCH





 

More than anyone could ever ask....   

:')




Friday, September 28, 2012

Girls vs girls


I hope that we can open your eyes and accept that we are not in
Paradise....
We are living in REALITY....
























































To unleash yourself........

For finding yourself is basically do what you like and don't be afraid to show the real you,There always be people judging you,but take that as a motivation to be better.People will always keep hating on what we do but we just gotta love our self and always remember it's not always about making other people satisfied,it's about living your life to the fullest and do the things that make you happy

Friday, September 7, 2012

I'm me right??

These days I felt like I wore a mask to school and here.I don't know why I can't unleash myself and find me.I always taught that finding yourself is easy but its not.It hurts when it comes to think of it.But, that doesn't stop me for finding who I am.Like people always says 'Each person on earth have their own specialty in them and so I will forever believe in that statement.Maybe for a mean time I will be a loser but the next time, a winner :) 

The truth is I kinda envy Izzatul (no offence) Its just that you are so natural.You hate when you do,You make jokes for our group to laugh on and you share some of our amazing memories + secret too.When it comes to that kind of person I called it perfect :3

But also thanks to you (Izzatul) I'm inspired to find myself.You'll see when the last piece of the missing puzzle complete the school will have a bless senior like ME,Izzatul,Afiqah D,Aisyah H and many more ;) 

Death Note..........

I remember when your tears are flowing,
I noticed that my sleeve's aren't exactly dry,
But when you die later,
Nothing matters to me because you're an evil sly!!

Your funeral will be in darkness and rain,
And i will remember your name,
Forever and always,
Our friendship is like a violent game.

That is not the story just yet,
I will always catch you with a nap,
But you hate me first, why would I like you back,
There is no other but to just kill you!!!! 

Written by le awesome classmate:-

Nadrah n Afiqah Dharwisyah.

Monday, August 27, 2012

Keep out your green eye

"Show me the meaning of being lonely Is this the feeling I need to walk with?,
Tell me why, I can't be there where you are... There's something missing in my heart;
 There's nowhere to run, I have no place to go;
 Surrender my heart, body and soul; 
How can it be you're asking me to feel, The things you never show?" 

What a poem. This is who you are!! A loner and a weak person. I tell you that I'm the wrong person for you to start the war. Cause when my bomb explode I feel so sorry for you! I warned you at least!.

Close my eyes

OMG Exam is coming up and I didn't study yet!! ARGHH!..(incredible monster rawr). Better study,wouldn't want the bad memories of last year haunting me tonight. No more online/stalking/using the internet (except for useful reasons & maybe abitt of stalking?) till exams are over. Wont leave my wifi on anymore, anything just sms although I may not reply coz bill hasn't restarted lol. Of coz that doesnt mean I'll study just do more irrelevant things ٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶ Neh,just kidding I need to study to get good result so I can go to...... *drumroll* Australia with my cuz. Yeah, "Each fun things come with an effort" so it's not a free vacation same goes to my cuz. Good luck to them for their UPSR & PMR!!

Friday, August 17, 2012

Breakfast with love ♥ ♥ ♥

My Mom n Dad's anniversary just passed. For their special day, me n my sisters make them a breakfast in bed. Nothing luxury just a french toast, which I usually cook when I'm starving n no ones around. It was 7 in the morning and the kitchen went crazy.... Worried that my mom n dad will wake up!. After a loud bang in the kitchen the breakfast was decorated with a red rose that my sister bought. It was fun but I hope to cook maybe a waffle with ice cream when I grow up a little older, and of course buy the waffle maker.

Friday, August 10, 2012

Simple Me




                       Girls school always have this kind of situation. Well, why fight If u understand this statement.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Angel from heaven.

Today is the 21th of fasting and for the Islamic it's the 10th day before raya so it's mean MALAM LAILATUL QADAR (malam yg paling baik drpd seribu malam) is just around the corner. Yoo-hoo~. Last night I dreamed about my grandmom who past away 6 years ago. Even though she left us for 6 years I feel like it's just yesterday. All those memories when I'm with her feel so fresh. I dreamed that I was lost and fell into this world of unknown. When I opened my eyes I saw HER standing far away from me. There is two rows of HUGE, GIGANTIC trees and a path. When SHE took a step the trees bow down to her giving HER shades. As she came closer to me, I feel a little bit chill but not in a scary way but in a calm way. As she gently pat my head with her bare cold hands, SHE smiled without tears. Slowly SHE stepped backwards the image of her fades away and out came a ............."KAKAK! Wake up time to sahur".

This is a true story not creating it / rewriting it. Like what people say " WHEN YOU REMEMBER THAT PERSON, THAT PERSON REMEMBERS U BACK, even though the dead.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Wrong English, watt the heck?!

Aoccdrnig to The awesome's theroy on Enlgish, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht frist and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Today my life begins.....

I've been working hard so long, seems like pain has been my only friend and my fragile heart been hurt so bad, I wondered if I'd ever heal it again. Just like all the seasons, never stay the same. All around me, I can feel the change. I see that I was wrong for ever doubting I could win. People always say that I couldn't but now I've learned to break these chains that bind me and happiness will find me, leave the past behind me, today my life begins as a whole new world is waiting and it's mine for the taking. I know I can make it, TODAY MY LIFE BEGINS......

Monday, July 2, 2012

Fly so high......

I remember those hard and dark times(last year), tears lost their light flowing down to my cheeks. But I never stop giving up just because I failed. Like the ground hardening after the rain. I dream of tomorrow and draw out. All my hopes and dreams came true even though it's difficult and hard. I believe that I can rise again no matter how many times I fall. Retie my loose shoelaces once again and I'm proud of that. There isn't enough time for you to leave just because of some failures, there's only one thing it's keep moving forward. We have a bright future ahead of us and there is an open world for us to run towards. Don't think it's hard and start right now. So you can fly higher next time.

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Once in a life time.....

Flash back when I was 9. Wow time past by like in a blink of an eye.....I feel like it's just yesterday I'm a kid now, I'm grown up teen, even though I'm immature, clumsy, emo. I'm still lovable among my friends and family ;)










 It'll be nice to have it again ;)

Friday, June 29, 2012

Once in a while.........

These days I feel empty in me so I took my camera and start snapping some pictures. How I love to see good results.




And these from my drawings. Well let's put it as me n my sister.




I start drawing and taking pictures after I saw Nadiah Ramli's blog (SA senior).How inspired I am with her creative work that change my life from writing craps on my blog into a normal,simple yet attractive. ;) Thnx 



That brave little girl.

Cheryl Costello Forshey, Her hair was up in a ponytail, her favourite dress tied with a bow. Today was Daddy’s day at her school but her mommy tried to tell her to stay at home still she couldn’t wait to go. Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone. But she was not afraid, she knew just what to say, what to tell her classmate of why he wasn’t there today. But still her mother was worried, for her to face this day alone. But the little girl went to school, eager to tell them all about a dad she never sees, a dad who never calls. There were daddies along the hall in back for everyone to meet. Children squirming impatiently anxious in their seats. One by one the teacher called a student from the class to introduce their daddy. As seconds slowly passed, at last the teacher called her name. Every child turned to stare, each of them was searching, “Where’s her daddy?” She heard a boy called out. “She probably don’t have one !” Another student dared to shout. And from somewhere near the back , she heard a daddy says “Looks like another deadbeat dad, to busy to waste his day” The words did not offend her, as she smiled up at her mom and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on. With her hands behind her back, slowly she began to speak. And out from a child mouth , came word incredibly unique. “My Daddy couldn’t be here, because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be here since this is such a special day. And even though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know all about my daddy and how he loves me so”. "He loved to tell me stories,he taught me to ride my bike.He surprised me with pink roses,and he taught me to fly a kite. "We used to share fudge sundaes,and ice cream in a cone.And though you cannot see him,I’m not standing all alone cause my daddy’s always with me,even though we are apart I know because he told me,he’ll forever be here in my heart”. With that her little hand reached up,and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat,beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads,her mother stood in tears.Proudly watching her daughter,who was wise beyond her years. For she stood up for the love,of a man not in her life. Doing what was best for her, doing what was right. And when she dropped her hand back down,staring straight into the crowd.She finished with avoice so soft,but its message clear and loud“I love my daddy very much,he’s my shining star.And if he could he’d be here,but heaven’s just too far". "But sometimes when I close my eyes,it’s like he never went away”. And then she closed her eyes,and saw him there that day.And to her mother’s amazement,she witnessed with surprise. A room full of daddies and children,all starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they saw before them,who knows what they felt inside. Perhaps for merely a second,they saw him at her side“I know you’re with me daddy.” To the silence she called out. And what happened next made believers,of those once filled with doubt.Not one in that room could explain it,for each of their eyes had been closed. But there placed on her desktop,was a beautiful fragrant pink rose. And by the love of her shining bright star And given the gift of believing, that heaven is never too far. ;)

Where am I ???

I feel slightly lost nowadays. Somewhere along the line, the bright lights woke me up into a reality life. My current circumstances, however, are not much better. It makes me sad to see how everything has changed in a blink of en eye. People I used to see every day have turned so distant, I barely know who they are anymore. Even worse, with the people I still see every day, It have almost become the unknown to me, neither here nor there, constantly listening to conversations I would love to take part in, but have no idea what they're talking about. Almost. If not for the few people that still feel like home. For them, I am grateful. My days are filled with time/energy for activities, and it becomes quite tiresome- but I survived for the 6 glorious months and waiting for another 5 more years to end of the secondary life, but in this 6 months it consist mostly with our lovely company, laughter, lazy conversations, and a few iced drinks here and there. Slightly lost, but also strangely content. I also wanted to say I'm so sorry for my bad behavior these days. I souldn't do that just because I'm lost out of nowhere and I souldn't put on a mask underneath me. If you don't mind, lend me a hand to pull me up and borrow me your shoulders for my tears the kept all these days.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Don't just stand there!!

How to move on??? CTRL + ALT + DEL :- 'Control' yourself, look for an 'Alternative' solution and 'Delete' the situation that hurts you.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

No more next time.

People will hate when they are being lied straight to the face when they know every bit of the truth. It hurts and make them go nuts of giving that someone a clue that they actually know everything. But they know they can't be mad at them because'APOLOGIZING DOES NOT ALWAYS MEAN YOU ARE WRONG. IT JUST MEANS THAT THEY ACTUALLY VALUE THEIR RELATIONSHIP MORE THEN MY EGO'. Sometimes we have to many things to play with until we forgot that feeling and hearts are not one of them.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Memorable day (^=^)

Today is fun, emo, crazy & most tiring day. Why?? Because of kawad?? No! Because of NIE. Yup! Wait watt is NIE?? It's NEWS IN ENGLISH. It is so damm fun. We did servay today <-- asking around. First it was sad and tired I got a little emo going around. Ok maybe a little to far but! But we got a lot of foreigner. There is from Germany, Philippines and there is also a mixed australian and malaysian. We became close = friends ♥♥♥



Thursday, May 10, 2012

Words of Wisdom.

Stop saying "I wish" and start saying "I will". Think of possibilities as probabilities. Why strive to fit in and be ordinary when you can stand out and be extraordinary. There will be two days you can't predict or have no control over, which are brith and death. The rest is what you make of. The between is where you make a difference, challenge others and DARE TO LIVE.

Monday, May 7, 2012

To Mom....

Mother's day is close once more, an opportunity to thank you for. The many things you did for me, although at times I couldn't see. Your wisdom so true and clear, left me calm and free from fear. So before I let this day pass by, allow me an opportunity to try and tell you how I feel inside. This feelings I cannot hide, this Mother's day I must confess. Mom you are the simply best!

Saturday, May 5, 2012

How that little thing became big??

It's sad when people you know become the people you knew. When you can walk right past someone like they were never a big part of your life. How you used to be able to talk for hours and how now, you can barely even look at them. That awkward moment when you think you were important to someone and you're not. You're gonna hate the moment where your anger turns into tears. That invisible tears are the hardest to wipe away. 8(

For my little dorky friends....

I got your back you got mine, I'll help you out anytime. To see you hurt to see you cry, makes me weep and wanna die. And if you agree to never fight, it wouldn't matter who's wrong or right. If a broken heart needs a mend, I'll be there, till the end. If your cheeks are wet from drops of tears, don't worry, let go of your fears. Hand in hand love is sent, we'll be friends till the end. If I had a flower for every time you make me smile or laugh, I'd have a garden to walk in FOREVER!!

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Faith, Trust & Pixie Dust???

Ignore the title cause watt I'm posting today is about courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of actions and follow it to an end requires some of courage. Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quite voice at the end of the day saying "I will try again tomorrow" 8)

Us, we stand together!!

A strong girl is the one who feels deeply and loves fiercely. Her tears flow just as abundantly as her laughter. A strong girl is also both soft and powerful, practical and spiritual. A strong girl in her essence, is a gift to the world. They are like tea bags, you don't know how strong they are until you put them in the hot water.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Don't judge

Don't judge me the life that I live because you don't have the right to. I know I'm not perfect & I don't live to be. My feelings hurt easily. I can be emotional till crying buckets. I trust those I shouldn't. I loved with all my hearts even though it's broken. But everyday I learn to be stronger. Next time before you start pointing fingers make sure that Your hands are clean... You need to understand that watt you see in me is watt I chose to show you.

Friday, April 27, 2012

Take time to realize.

I'm not a perfect girl. My hair doesn't always stay on place & I spill things a lot. I'm pretty clumsy & sometimes I have a broken heart. My friends & I sometimes fight & maybe some days are the days where nothing goes right. But when I think about it & I took a step back I remember how amazing life truly is & maybe ..... Just maybe I like being UNPERFECT. Because theres no fun in a perfect life. So I will take chances. Go where the wind takes me & the most important is HAVE FUN!!

Patiently waiting 8)

Girls are like apples on the tree. The best one always at the top. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling or getting hurt. Instead they got the rotten apples from the ground that aren't so good but EASY. So the apples on top think something is wrong with them when but in the reality they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top. So wait for it and don't have to rush.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Strong in faith.

When you REALLY want something, sometimes you need to swim a little deeper... You can't give up just because things don't come EASY... You have to overcome the obstacles and face your fears... But in the end it's all worth while! Life is full with upside downs, But if you belive in yourself you will always come through with flying colours!! Value of friendship, love & FAITH... Never underestimate yourself... Always belive in yourself + Have a good life friends!! ♥♥

What hurt me the most.

Hurts me the most is when the memories I used to hold it so close to me are now the memories that I wish I forget about it FOREVER!!

Friday, April 13, 2012

Doesn't last forever.

Nothing last forever, so live it up, drink it down, laugh it off, avoid the bullshit, take chances & never have regrets because, at one point everything you did is exactly as you wanted. So have a big smile on your face!! 8) Zaza

Thursday, April 12, 2012

It hurts. (T^T)

When I cry my lips start to shake and tears build up quickly and fall fast. I bent over or crouched trying to hide in it and not make any noise but it hurts to much to hold it in so, I let out a yelp and a cry then, comes the loss of breath which sucks because not only I'm crying out loud but I think I sound dumb for not breathing too. It's just a mess. All those moments that we have together will be lost in time, like tears in the rain. I hope that every thing or every minute we spend together is the precious moment in you mind that will never be erased. Goodbye~ 8) Zaza

Friday, March 16, 2012

Why me??

Am I a bad luck charm?? Today is a horrible day for me. I just want to run till my heart content and climb the highest mountain then shout as hard as I can till the whole world hears me. Arghh!! if only I'm that crazy I would.

On my birthday, feel like dumping my face on the cake. The drama starts this morning when I casually asked my mom to buy me those cool new iPhones that do almost everything. I considered it a necessity of life, second only to maybe oxygen. Though I was just kidding bout the phone I knew it just going to exist in my dream.

So, as my mom & dad went to KLCC with my uncle & aunt I'm stuck here at home thinking as if I'm dead. I'm hanging around in my room lying on my bed like a 'dugong' and teaching a cousin some Japanese words. Then, a sister think it's a waste of time listening to me blabbering about nonsense, she butt out from my bedroom and went down insted.

While I was blabbering my maid dash into my room, without knocking, and have the pale look as if she saw a headless women in her bathroom and said to me " kakak, where is Zara & Iman " I look like a goof when she question me. She said that oh she is in the kitchen all the time and BLA BLA BLA (blame it on me). Then we found those 2 reckless children in my stepgranmom's room.

After I found them I settle down. Then my doorknob lock got jamm. In my head said that " great first the 2 kids now this?? Next watt " so I called my dad. Guess watt he put on a blame at me to for locking the door??. I'm so tired that I cry. I know such a baby aren't I??. Rite now I just want to close my eyes a think this is all a dream.

This is the most logest that I'd ever wrote well bye then. Write later~

8) Zaza

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Something that ALLAH promise . .

Allah didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, or sun without rain. But He did promise a strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way.

I got to learn from Mom that Allah will test us with the test that we can afford. Because the test will keep us strong.

Be strong friend!!

8) Zaza